QUESTION BOARD

Signs Studio 2000 once offered an online Free Question Board for decades on this site. Thousands of people from the US and around the world asked astrological questions and received answers.Some of those questions will be included in this format.

ASK A QUESTION: Question should include the date of birth, time of birth, (if known) and place of birth. Include your user name, or nickname. Keep your question concise.

Send your question here: E-MAIL Elna or just click here: E-Mail

Your own address will never be shared. If you are not online or cannot access e-mail, mail your question to: Elna Nugent,Signs Studio 2000, 8 Hutchinson Lane, Lenox, MA 01240 The purpose of the Question Board is to share the information given so that all can benefit. Blessings, Elna

Finding Myself .... Quantum Processes... I'm Adopted ... Daughter left us ... When will I get marrried?

If you have already sent a question and have not received an answer, please e-mail it again and indicate QUESTION BOARD in the address area. ________________________________________________________________________________________ QUESTION: About the blue moon. What is it and why is it designated blue and not yellow? Will we have one this year?

ANSWER: We had a blue moon last year on November 2010, but we will not have a blue moon this year,2011. The next one will be Aug.31, 2012.

A blue moon is a second full moon occurring in one calendar month. It is the third out of four full moons in a given season. The term blue usually refers to the saying "once in a blue moon" meaning that an incident being discussed is so rare it would only occur once in a blue moon.. meaning probably never . Due to modern photography, actual moons have appeared to be light blue due to unusual lighting on dust particles. There is an actual photo of one online at spaceweather.com under the site bluemoonstones.html

QUESTION FROM BG: Hi Elna: I was laughing so hard when I read your Board Question from Ellan about her "Leo".Gosh, I can't tell you how much I wish I had known you or your Question Board when my Leo was young. Your advice was so clear...where were you when I needed you?....but he is now the most wonderful adult, kind and loving and good to me.

But I also want to know whether Uranus entering my First House 2012 is something I should be nervous about. And what about the dreaded square from Uranus and Pluto coming up in the new year?

ANSWER FROM ELNA: There will be seven exact squares between Uranus and Pluto between 2012-2015. Uranus (new freedom and revolution) challenging Pluto (entrenched dictatorial energies and traditions) This is not only a generational tug-of-war it is a global one. As for us, we feel this same challenge internally. Consider what we believe to be traditional and invincible in us as opposed to new jarring ideas and freedoms beckoning. What happened in Egypt is also happening inside us. And in this new age, the internet lets us know what is happening as it is happening.

As for Uranus entering your First House, that will be over a duration of seven years. You may not know yourself in seven years or eight years. You may have changed drastically. Just know it will be a newness that unconsciously you have felt was needed but it wasn't the right time. Trust the years ahead despite the upheavals and changes that will take place. Read overview 2011, on our first page.

As for your comments about little four-year old Leo in the last question, thank you for your feedback. My little Leo also grew up to be a saving grace.

QUESTION FROM ELLAN: Elna, I am sending you my 4 yr-old son "Leo's" birth information. To keep it short, I am having great difficulty disciplining this child. He thinks he is a little man. He has to be in charge and run things. We have a lot of construction going on in the area, so a couple of weeks ago he decided to put on his construction hat and sneak out of his bedroom window.(I was busy with the baby) He went out into the street to "help" direct traffic. Soon he had a long line of heavy equipment operators jammed up in the middle of the road for a half a block.

Naturally I got heavy complaints saying I can't control my son, even though I have invested a small fortune on special locks. There isn't one of them he can't figure out. Once I even put a chain lock at the top of the door-he took a broom handle, stuck it in between the chain and the door, and wiggled it until the lock came loose. That happened when he just turned three and he has been getting smarter ever since. This is the tip of the iceberg. He has no respect for me and no amount of control or compromise helps. There is quite a power struggle going on and I don't know where it lies. Can you help?

ANSWER FROM ELNA : Ellan, I sympathize. Right now your little guy has transiting Pluto conjoining the MC of the chart with Mars aiding and abetting a complex power struggle. The key words in your question are "while I was busy with the baby". Need we say more. Your son has been displaced and feels he is no longer tops on your priority list. Your son has quite a strategy going that will insure he gets the attention he misses. Little Leo doesn't want words or discipline, he wants you and has to know that you "still like him". Your chart shows you have an "inner teacher" who can be quite creative..like telling him he is part of your construction crew that helps you keep walkways in the house free of toys and obstructions.

But right now he associates your disapproval of him with the baby. He needs to know he is a notch up in the household as the elder brother and protector. You could even give him a badge to wear that says "Big Brother of the house". Most important-if you can take even "just fifteen minutes a day" and devote that time exclusively to him, listen to his questions, let him bring things to you, or have a story time, you will begin to see a difference. He has to have this time while baby is napping- exclusively with you- no interruptions. Let the phone ring. Let him talk to you and let him see that you are listening. You have an active brilliant child that probably needs outside help to offer the kind of constant stimulation beyond what you can give him. You also need a break. Get back to me if you need more clarification. God Bless.

FEEDBACK FROM ELLAN: Every day now I try to let "Little Leo" choose a place we can go each day( beach, grocery store, or the park where he can show off his flipping abilities on the monkey bars) I also put him in charge of something like having us remember seat belts, knowing where the diaper bag is, helping me to remember what I went to the store for. Then I praise a job well done and he feels like a giant. When baby is asleep we watch the Discovery Kids on TV, eat goldfish crackers, and cuddle.

Finally I enrolled him in preschool for the fall. I'll never forget the look on his face when I told him we had to get dressed and eat breakfast so he could attend school. He ran out to the window and yelled at the construction workers," Did you hear that? I'm going to school and I have a frog that just had a baby frog. I know because I found it." Even more endearing was that he forgot he was completely naked. Oh, and Elna, I am actually considering going back to school for a teaching certification.

QUESTION FROM CEE in Ireland: Elna, my life over the last three years has been turned inside out and upside down. My father passed away in July 2007 and in March 2008 I resigned from my role as Exec. Assiastant with a large corporation. I temped for some years and then in February of this year joined another large corporation - then resigned two weeks ago. It was hell - Maybe it's me but the environment just doesn't do it for me anymore, brings me no joy or incentive to create anything.

But it's all I have known, and to say I am anxious to start working again is an understatement.I live alone and have always supported myself so need to work, but also need it from a psychological point of view. It's just I don't know what to do now. I will work some temp office jobs but need to focus on a bigger picture and maybe start training in something that will bear fruit some years down the line. The trouble is I don't know what I need to focus on.

It's like my whole life needs to change but I am afraid of drastic change and anyway, I literally don't know where to begin. The friends and aquaintances I had over the years seem to have vanished and have not been replaced - I had some terrible betrayals that still hurt to think about but I am trying to move forward... only, I'm not.

The house I live in is too big for me now and in the wrong location. With the downturn in the property market, there is no market to sell, so I need to stay put... along with the fact that I am emotionally attached to it as my father spent a lot of time here. I never really grieved my father's passing, even though he was ill for four years. But I was shocked when it happened, and I think I still am. It's like everything that was solid and secure in my life has crumbled to dust and it frightens me and yet in some small space inside I know I couldn't have kept on the way I was - working 60 hour weeks in large corporations where they cared for nothing or no one, only profit.

I'm 43 years old, Elna, and it's like I am starting all over again, but I feel so confused and all over the place right now.If you can see anything in my chart that is contributing to my current situation and can shed light on what I need to do I will be most grateful and thankful. I have enclosed my date of birth and time. My best wishes to you and my heartfelt thanks.

ANSWER FROM ELNA: Deirdre: When transiting Saturn moves toward the bottom of the chart, it is a time when many people refuse to keep battling the tigers of the external world. They have had it. They prefer to learn a new field of endeavor or even go back to school to do it, either literally or figuratively.

Transiting Saturn, now in your 2nd House, restricts financially but makes us very aware of what we really value. We are more likely to spend only on what is meaningful or productive. With Saturn soon opposing your natal Saturn in the 9th House, you begin to realize you have to make changes. The old ways don't work anymore. Careerwise, you have already made a decisive break. But for your personal spiritual growth, you may feel the need to move in a different circle, seek out truths wherever they can be found. Dare new directions.

Interesting that while Saturn is moving down your chart, expansive Jupiter in Taurus is moving to the top of your chart. Jupiter spells opportunity. Right now it is posited in the 9th House. But although you may eventually have opportunities to travel, you may not be quite as anxious to do so as you used to. The Taurean influence likes to stay put in comfortable surroundings and explore the world through the senses.This is more of a time to take on new attitudes, new cultures, new languages, or different ways of living.

In May of 2012, Jupiter will hit the top of your chart -and then go into your 10th House of Career-- But for now, Jupiter is in your 9th House and beckons you toward education, philosophy, writing, publishing or even teaching. You may meet people from other cultures who expand your consciousness. They can help you feel more tolerant of people different from yourself.

Your natal chart already has an eastern emphasis of planets which means you are better able than most to make your life what you want it to be. You have the will and the freedom to chart your own course without too much interference. Life has taught you to take care of yourself, your health, and your well being. You are still in a healing period but are gradually coming out of it.

In late September, Saturn will move into your 3rd House of Communications for over two years. This is a time when you become acutely aware of how you are being perceived by others-how you look, how you dress, your hair etc. People tend to update their clothing during this period. This is a good time to listen to yourself as others hear you. This will be a time to pretend to be the person you are speaking to and "listen to your own voice and words as if hearing them through their ears." Much daily short distance travel is part of the 3rd House experience. This is also a time when- if you have any relatives-you are more likely to hear from them or you might even feel like communicating with them.

Cee: You have favorable aspects coming up in the fall. Keep in touch. The very best to you.

QUESTION 2 FROM- Sanorita 76: Hi Elna: Please tell me what numbers are significant for me. I have sent you the information you requested.

ANSWER FROM ELNA: Dear Sanorita The number relating to your date of birth is considered to be your birth path or life lesson number. In your case the birth path number is a Number 7. As a 7 you are intuitive, a thinker, and meditator yet you are meant to develop your analytical or even your mathematical mind. Still you need to have spaces of time where you are alone in order to study and be in touch with the higher energies. Music, art and being near water helps you. You are meant to teach or bring insight to others when it is required.

Your name at birth is your Destiny Number that helps you fulfill your purpose for being here. In your case the Destiny Number is a 6 meaning you are a person born to be of service to others. You are able to take on responsibiity in domestic affairs using your energies to serve at home and in the outer world. ( Not surprising that your natal chart also shows six planets posited in the section of the chart that shows service to the public in some way)

Although your birth name is your name forever, when you marry and take on a new name, that name vibration is a strong overlay of influence on your life. In your case it is a "one" vibration which adds ambition and independence to your original number (Your husband is a Number One) Blessings to you both.

QUESTION FROM- Sanorita 76: Hi Elna: God bless you for your work and help.I just want to know when my financial crisis will be over and if it's possible for you to please read my lucky personal numbers.

ANSWER FROM Elna: I received your question about finances exactly at the time transiting (orbiting) Uranus entered your 2nd House of Money. For the next several years your money issues may continually fluctuate. Money is likely to be gained only to be lost later--then to be regained again. This might be because you chose to invest any newly gained funds in a car, an apartment, or an investment which will drain you financially. It is imperative that you do not spend on what you can't afford.

The 2nd House of Money teaches us what we truly value, whether it is a relationship, a way of life, or a dream of what we most admire. This may or may not relate to money. "What means the most to you on your deepest level?" If you can keep your mind and heart on what you most value, your money problems will lessen. Unexpected circumstances may bring you a sudden winfall and/or opportunity. How you use this money is the key to your money issues ahead. This is a long-term influence that is meant to teach you how you can best use money to real advantage.

I can only answer one question at a time on this board. I do not do "lucky numbers" but I can tell you what numbers have significance in your life. I would need to know your full name at birth to fully answer your "special numbers" question. If married, I would have to know the married surname as well. Blessings.

QUESTION FROM Taurus/Aries Rising: Uranus will enter my 1st House the end of May 2012. I am concerned as to how this might affect me. The fact that Uranus and Pluto will be squaring each other--off and on-starting in June. This is a concern for me as it affects my 1st and 10th houses. How am I likely to be affected by this?

Answer from Elna for Taurus/Aries Rising: Yes, Uranus will conjoin your Ascendant Aries, and enter House 1 in your chart late May of 2012 and remain for about seven years. This will probably indicate amazing changes that affect you personally.

YOU ARE GETTING FED UP with your life, the old routines and living patterns and ways of operating. This begins a period when you will escape them. You will throw things away. Just save what is real and relevant.

Since the First House is the House of the self, you,may change how you look, even the color of your hair, the clothes you choose or you may make a geographical move. People may be shocked at how much you are going to change your lifestyle in the next few years. They might not even recognize you when they see you. You are in the cocoon stage now.

Transiting Pluto will be in your 10th House of Status squaring your Ascendant and first House- at the same time that transiting Uranus is there. Astrologers take note only of how these transiting planets affect the natal chart- rather than each other. Uranus and Pluto are the outer planets that affect generations. They affect the world around us more than our personal selves. 2010 is a time of global change that is probably unprecedented. We have already seen natural disasters around the world. Everything seems to be in extreme. We are affected by these changes only in how flexible and easily we can adapt to social changes. We learn to live in a new way, and as it can sometimes mean upheaval, it is also exciting and new and adventuresome.

July 2011

QUESTION FROM ARIES: Hello Elna: Does a person's natal chart determine whether he will fail to live up to his potential and whether he will suffer from depression? The Aries forecasts mention positive things all the time and I can't relate to them. I feel no bright spots and have little strength to overcome worries-yet I keep trying. Is this depression or is it in my chart??

ANSWER from Elna: Dear Aries: You have an ambitious. talented Sun in Aries (the warrior-artist) locked up in the karmic 12th House along with a Venus in Aries which wants to relentlessly pursue and win any object of affection or monetary goal that appeals. But the first thirty or so years of your life are likely to be obscure or blocked in some way, followed by more favorable changes.

You may feel imprisoned because when you donŐt get what you want you feel deeply hurt and take it personally. When you don't express the anger you feel toward others you are likely to turn it inward and repress it where it becomes either depression or an escape through addiction, food, drink etc. This powerful energy is best expressed in superior work that will speak for you. Your Sun placement is in a challenging angle to Mars which can produce impulsive, overly aggressive behavior. Yet only patience will get you what you want though not necessarily at the time you want it.

Metaphysically, patience is one of the most powerful of all attributes, one that few of us develop without struggle. We are given challenges over and over in life to develop patience. Once we let go and trust that the universe can give us even more than what we could dream, we can get more of a sense of peace. But we must ask for it and then know it will happen. One of the strongest signs, Taurus, is on your Venus-ruled Ascendant. A loving, secure existence is your dream. When you get it, all else is likely to follow.

June 27 2011

QUESTION FROM BG: Casey Anthony Outcome? I'm wondering if you have an opinion on what the outcome of the Casey Anthony trial will be? From a reliable source I have included her birth information. I would really like to know your opinion.

ANSWER FOR BG: Thank you for sending the birth data. I did not have Casey Anthony's time of birth so hadn't considered the verdict,astrologically. I'm not sure I could, anyway.

But the time of birth indicates Mars and Uranus conjoined in Casey's 5th House and squaring the Pisces 8th House Sun. Astrologer Frances Sakoian wrote that an afflicted Uranus in the 5th House in a female chart, indicates pregnancy outside of marriage and that the children may either be neglected or given too much freedom. Also with Mars also afflicted in the 5th House" The native's children are subject to accidents or death."

Casey's chart suggest a complex vengeful, rebellious pathology. But I don't see her as a sociopath, because she can be very caring at times while being a person of extremes. She is supersentive, shy, and brooding in contrast to her other side that is attracted to danger and sensationalism, refusing to live a humdrum life and apt to take any risk to avoid it.

I don't think Casey will be given the death penalty and we don't know yet when the verdict will come down but on July 1, we have a powerful New Moon coming up opposing Pluto and with a solar eclipse in Cancer. This is the third eclipse in a row that forms a cardinal grand cross and which seems to align with one weather catastrophe after another. This eclipse opposes authority and suggests explosive social change. In our daily lives this can actually force attitudinal changes, growth, and advancement, all of which are life giving- even as we try to resist them all the way.

June 24 2011: Fearing Future job changes

QUESTION FROM LEO, with Cancer rising: I am concerned about my job as many changes have taken place in the last couple of years including furloughs and rumors of layoffs and health care/retirement problems going forward.

Uranus will again be squaring my 10th House end of May 2014.I'm worried about how all this will affect me.Would you please give me your opinion as I am very fearful of my future. I have worked hard to get where I am . It is my plan to retire in July of 2024. It is my hope that I will not be without my retirement and healthcare at that time.Thank you for any help.

ANSWER FOR Leo/Cancer rising: RIGHT NOW, since I cannot give you a projection analysis through 2014 on a question board--it is would be helpful for you to take stock of exactly who you are, and in what areas of expertise you are most accomplished. Then stand strong in that experience and give to each day the best you can give. All else will follow.

Tact, diplomacy, and understated confidence can get you ahead this year and next. If you are offered a position of more power and control, try to align your goals with the goals of others involved. Only then will you advance.

Yes, Uranus has been tweaking all those deeply hidden unexpressed fears and energies you have stored up in the 12th House Mars in Cancer. Good to get those hidden resentments expressed and out into the sun. The Cancerian energy seeks security above all else and I am sure you will get what you need and what is due you.

Early this month, Jupiter finally left Aries and entered Taurus for a year. Jupiter will reach your natal Moon in April of 2012, a very positive aspect that will likely make you feel much more secure and comfortable.

You will reach your Jupiter Return in April. If you can resist the temptation to gamble, invest, or be too distracted by a seemingly perfect person who surfaces or by too ideal a situation that offers the moon, you will not have a problem. If something sounds too good to be true, take a second look. As a Leo, you are a bright light backed up by a strong Taurean Moon and a looming Jupiter Return. Blessings.

June 22 2011: Will I marry again?

QUESTION FROM:Taurus, Aries Rising: I'm wondering if you see a chance for another marriage for me. My husband passed away in 2005. (Birth information is enclosed)

ANSWER: TAURUS, ARIES RISING: You have a strong inherent and insistent need for marriage. Libra rules your 7th House. Transiting Saturn is now in your 7th House of marriage, having entered July of last year but remaining there until October of 2012. Marriage is a priority right now, in exclamation marks.

Many astrologers feel that with transiting Saturn in the 7th there is more than a good chance you could marry or form a committed relationship with someone. Saturn is not into frivolous connections. Saturn is into serious relationships which are fair, just, and committed. This year it is likely you will form a bond with someone older than you, one who has had more experience than you, but who could teach you important lessons. However, this person could become a burden and there may be hard work involved with him. Or in reverse, you could be the teacher, mentoring someone younger with whom you form a strong connection.

This year Jupiter is conjoining your natal Jupiter in Taurus. This marks the beginning of a new 12-year cycle of liberation. People may suddenly appear in your life who are supportive. I wonder if people from your past are re-emerging-beginning last summer. I cannot tell you exactly when or if you get married in the year to come, but there certainly is an excellent chance that you could.

Question about natal charts

QUESTION from Christa: Recently my sister and I traveled to Sedona, Arizona to experience the strong vortex sites in that area. We heard alot about Natal Charting but we did not have one done. Could you please explain Natal Charts and how to read them? We know how to get free charts online but they are not explained. Does it matter if you use your maiden or married name?

ANSWER: Christa, what matters most is your birthdate place, and time of birth. If you know all of this you can get a complete chart analysis. But it takes years of study, consultation and training to analyze and interpret a natal chart. The chart is like a "photograph" of the sky/planets at the moment we were born and all the degrees-of-aspect they make to us on earth.

Your chart indicates you have a powerful identity and intensity that registers strongly even if you don't say a word. You could probably be quite successful in any medical/scientific field/x-ray or photographic field.

I would suggest you and your sister consider taking an astrology course to learn the basics. You can learn a great deal without knowing your time of birth. You can buy the book: The Only Way to Learn Astrology Volume I Basic Principles by Marion March..online at: ASTRO Just scroll down the page to the astrology books. (As for which name to use, it is only the study of Numerology that requires your full maiden name for analysis)

May 2011: What's going on astrologically?

5/01/11QUESTION from David: What is happening in my chart? Last week was a pretty interesting week. Was wondering if there was something unusual?

ANSWER: Unusual is an understatement. Last week and this first week of May are full of such extraordinary energy we can expect almost anything. A powerful conjunction of planets in fiery Aries is occurring. The Moon, Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter and explosive Uranus are all in the warrior sign Aries, expressing in a variety of ways according to each natal chart. We cannot be too surprised by that catastrophic tornado in the south, a memorable royal wedding in England and a postponed space launch all happening in one week.

AS FOR YOUR PERSONAL CHART, all of these planets are in your 5th House that involves love affairs, creative self expression, children, recreation, and the "redefining and externalization of the self." You are likely to find new strength in being yourself as you never have before. You are likely to meet someone from an entirely different background or culture that can teach you more than you could have imagined. More importantly you don't have to hide from the world. Your relationships with children and those close are coming alive in a new way. Just take care that your confidence doesn't come across to others as being too heavy. If you can just be yourself, this powerful conjunction can work wonders of welcome change in your personal life and spill over onto everything else.

Finding Myself

Tom. Question entitled: Finding Myself?

QUESTION: Hi.I don't really know how to start.I'm curious about this natal chart thing.I've been reading the different descriptions about my astrological sign. Some sites are right on, but others are way off. All I know is I need to get more information about me, things I can't see by myself. How can I be happy with me?

ANSWER: Tom: You have three Gemini placements and three Virgo planets. Both Gemini and Virgo are ruled by Mercury which means you have a lightning-fast intelligence that is so quick your speech might overpower people. You can sometimes come across as too volatile or forceful, especially when relating to women.

If you can learn to listen, really listen, really "hear" the person who is speaking to you-this alone could actually change your life.

LEO is on your Ascendant which tells a lot about how you look. One thing is sure- you get noticed when you enter a room. You have an unusual, possibly charismatic physical appearance no matter what kind of looks you have. Whether you are very short or very tall or very "something else", it doesn't matter- you will never be overlooked.

TOM: I must be real with you. You have four chart indications that alcohol or some other escape-defense mechanism reacts as a "sheer poison" on you. You are smart enough to know this and even know what to do about it. You respect new and modern forms of health care. The "real you" is buried under your heavy facade and social image. The "real you" is your personalized "Consciousness" that lives on and can never die. You might want to get back in touch with this essential self and form a respect for it, despite its flaws.The first step is to be stunningly honest with yourself and work toward having a healthy body. The rest will follow.

Later feedback from Tom: Wow, you hit it right on the nose. I have been told I look very intimidating, unapproachable etc. I've always had trouble talking to women, and have a hard time dealing with emotions (broken home at an early age) I smoke and tend to drink too much at least once a week, which has been bothering me quite a bit lately (my life fell apart last fall). Thank you very much for the advice.I think it will help give me the kick in the butt I've needed for the past 8 months.And I may even have the whole chart thing done to find out more details.
Quantum Processes

Quantum Processes and Astrology

QUESTION: There is a growing consensus that quantum processes may not only occur in our brains but be the primary foundation for how our minds really work. One physicist believes that one of the things that causes quantum changes to occur is gravity itself. Just curious if this could help to explain how astrology and our personalities are intertwined.__Paul D.

ANSWER: The gravity idea seems to ring beckoning bells of possibility. Quantum changes and the ever present mystery of gravity suddenly take on a bright new sheen.

Prof. Rick Levine says quantum theory changes everything . He left chemical engineering to become one of the first environmental prizewinning architects and innovators. He became avidly interested in quantum mechanics and astrology. You might want to check out the website Quantum Advocate. Levine's book is Quantum Mechanics, Physics, and Astrology. He sounds like someone who would grab that"gravity theory"and run away with it.... Elna.

______________________________________________________________________________________________ Adoption

QUESTION: Elna, I'm adopted. How can astrology work for me? My birth date indicates I'm a Capricorn. When astrologers study the natal chart and mention my father, who are they referring to? Is it my biological father or my adoptive father?__Laurie from Michigan.

ANSWER: Laurie: The bottom line is: "Who, since your birth, has been the strongest overriding male energy impacting your daily life? This person could be your bio father, adoptive father, grandfather, uncle, friend, or even a huge paternalistic institution like the church or the military."

You didn't include your birthdata but the natal Sun and Saturn could give clues. The Sun Sign helps to describe the male spirit and personality. Saturn can define the paternalistic challenge you have faced. A natal Retrograde Saturn can indicate a father that was absent, even if physically present-but unresponsive or unconnected. In any case, Saturn rules your own sign Capricorn. Capricorns often assume responsibility early on within a family, and have been described as little adults well beyond their years. _
_______________________________________________________________________________________

Daughter running off
Our daughter is leaving us

SITUATION- A father is distraught because his divorced daughter with children has hired a UHaul and is moving to another state to live with a new man of another race he has never met.

QUESTION: I need some advice. My daughter is taking our grandchildren away without any warning. We are not closeminded people but I was so upset I completely lost it and then said some things to her I wish I hadn't. But we know nothing about this man. We have a huge family and most of us live in the area. We are so hurt because we were not told of her decision. My grandson is my little buddy who likes to tag along with me to fish, or work in the yard. She could at least have told us what was going on, instead of an"in your face,like-it-or-leave it"attitude she has adopted. What can we do to make this right?... G.J.

ANSWER: G: The only way you and your wife will hear from your daughter and her new man is to let her know you really do respect her decision-making ability and that he must be a great guy if she has chosen him. This is an urgent call for unconditional love and support on your part. She has to really believe you want to meet this new man in her life. Do not phone her, even if you know her number. Mail or E-mail a letter of apology for what you had said. Be patient and do nothing more. If you can do this, you may hear from her eventually. Take a position of strength and acceptance. If you can do this, you will probably see your grandchildren again.

FEEDBACK: Elna, thanks for the words of advice.I'm including my daughter's completed birth data that you requested. I know in my heart you are right. It is just hard to accept right now. I have helped make this into a pretty big mess.I think I will send an e-mail asking if we can meet her man and then just take it from there.
___________________________________________________________________________________________________




---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------